sian-ed & jaded

i wonder how i got sick.
so sick i never do anything for the past 2 days.
blame it on my laziness.
blame it on me for being me.
complacency sets in...

i refused to talk.
i blamed it on my sore throat.
but maybe there's another reason.
maybe i just didn't want to talk.
like how late i learnt to talk when i was a toddler.

i'm having weirder and weirder dreams.
it seems that the things i know got distorted.
and i dont know what is true anymore.
insecurity sets in.
cant help but feel helpless.