decided or undecided?

=.= scholarship sounds like such a distant thing to me.. how i wish i can really get down to work mighty hard just to achieve what i want. but in the first place do i know what i want? hai~ all i know to do is to sit in front of the com and use photoshop anyhow play, what else do i know? good for nothing useless bum.. big fat arse i've got.. BOOO!!!!

its so interesting, the things i got to listen to these days. never would have imagined occurence actually do occur, and things i thought would happen wont take place. nah~ i dont want to think about that too much though. =)

i guess mummy's right. oh yar.. ok flash back abit: had a talk with mummy last night on topics so sensitive other mothers may not even talk to their child about. la~ ok lar, can see she was damn tired then i still made her sit up and talk to me. haha~ selfish me rite, i know. but she was willing to tell me more lar.. yupp and i totally agree with her viewpoint.

so...i'm planning to:

"see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, dont even think"

i'm just going to try to live life as peacefully as i can. no relationship please.. they're such pain in the ass.. its not even physically there and its making so many people want to die, yet dont want to die.. such a crazy thing to get involve in. dont know what made me stuck in the same puddle of mud. it took so hell much thinking to get me out too! i just soooo dont know what i was doing. its damn crappy lar.

though he havent reply me, i think i need send him some regards. because i feel i have let him down, but i feel even more relieved. maybe i might consider remaining a spinster, it sounds interesting at the moment. aha! no la, dont think too far. at least for the moment, i'm not interested in getting myself into those unnecessary u like me i like u things anymore. they only spell TROUBLE~

back to serious issues.. intial d. i'm so god-damn going to catch it right after my last paper!!! bro watched it already and i'm darn jealous!!!! it's jus so unfair lar! he can catch it the first official day it came out. he's soooo damn lucky. i want to watch it. and i seriously dont mind going alone. because then, i can get some quie. which i dont really need, but it would be nice to have for a change.

lost all my photoshop pictures. my prevous blogskins, avatar, pictures... all gone. things that are gone are just so difficult to come back. hmm...

okok, i posted some new links. try find them. pretty easy though.